Today I’ve just started reading a book about self esteem and it’s got me thinking about my self esteem and the highs and lows I’ve experienced. Its been an ongoing uphill battle at times, but I am thankful that I am on the up nowadays. I think I can equate it to a combination of things (personal therapy, my counselling training, my faith in God, self acceptance etc).
I have come to the conclusion now that the foundation of my self
esteem comes from understanding and accepting myself
(which is an ongoing process) and most importantly…
…what I believe about myself.
Also in my profession as a counsellor and personal development trainer, I have witnessed personally from my client work how the thoughts and beliefs that run through ones mind (from past negative, difficult and painful experiences), can so powerfully overtake a person and literally have the power to break you.
However, when a person begins the journey into self awareness and starts to see the effects of their experiences in their thought life, with this insight they can choose to begin the process of replacing the old unhelpful beliefs with new life giving truthful beliefs – this is a process. In my truthful and honest opinion, my experience has shown me that only God can supernaturally change a person, restore and heal the deep hurts that life has bruised us with. Then the word (Jesus/The Bible) continues the ongoing washing, healing and restoration process.
Simply put: WHAT YOU BELIEVER ABOUT YOURSELF IS WHAT WILL MANIFEST AS YOUR REALITY.
So, simply put again: in order to challenge and change your thoughts, beliefs, perceptions etc. The mind must be challenged about the negative, old and unhelpful thoughts/beliefs and replaced/renewed with new positive, inspiring, empowering, life giving thoughts/beliefs etc.
I believe that only Gods word is the true inspiration and has the transforming power that we need to renew our minds and our lives to live peaceful, purposeful and fulfilled lives.
Life is a journey, an ongoing process and we are always learning…
BUT one must start their journey with a true and honest intention to seek answers to their quetions and solutions for their problems etc…and be willing to put the work in – THEN the exciting process of change, growth and development etc begins!
I have come to the stage in my journey that I fully, whole heartedly and completely rely solely on every word that God gives (either through the bible or spiritual revelation).
The word of God is my: strength, hope, inspiration, encouragement, comfort, wisdom, motivation, empowerment, guide. It is the reflection I need in the areas of my life that needs growth, development and maturity.
I simply cannot function in this life without God and I NEED to spend as much time as I can in His presence (reading the word, meditating, reflecting, praying, worshipping with music, being in church and with like minded believers).
I have tried MANY things to manage and cope with life but honestly, nothing comes close to a true relationship, utter and complete dependence on God.
I have to be honest though, I do have my down days when I will think various negative thoughts like:
“What’s the point?”
“Am I really getting anywhere?”
“When will I see the answer to the prayers I’ve prayed long ago?”
……And the classic:
“Its not fair, why me?” or even “Why not me – when will it be my turn?”
But I realise that sometimes its just the enemy taunting me and trying to upset me, steal my joy, plant seeds of doubt etc, and other times its just me allowing the old thoughts and negative thoughts (based on past experiences) replay in my mind. At these times, I may have a little sulk, shed some tears, take a rest and listen to some inspiring music, find something inspiring to read, pray and/or I’ll channel these thoughts and feelings into writing a song or journalling etc. Every day and situation is different, so I just go with the flow of what is right for that moment.
However God is without a doubt my lifeline and I am learning to trust Him daily.