Bitching rant

…another dear diary

…I wish I had something more interesting to blog about, rather than my winging tantrums…but I don’t!

…so I’m really struggling at the moment. I’m having a low time at the moment and rather than stay silent about, I’m just gonna vent here…

…I’ve always had highs and lows, so I’ve recently gone back to therapy to work through some more issues. I think I understand myself relatively well, so my frustration is why I am still having the same issues – disappointment with life!!!

I go to church weekly and try to keep my FACE in THE BOOK (bible), but in all honesty I am so unhappy. I find peace and hope in times of worship, inspiration from the bible but the rest of the time is one step away from torture!!! Still a Jesus believing dissatisfied with life Christian – sad 😦

I really don’t know what more I can do to enjoy my life. I guess I am tad bit ungrateful, I’ve got everything I need (house, car, food, money – the essentials). My dad keeps telling me to be happy and enjoy my life because i have a lot going for me. He is right and to be honest I mostly do. I just hit low points like now, where I am just really lonely and just wish I had someone I could share my life with intimately. Someone that gives a crap whether I exist or not, and has time and wants to spend it with me rather than giving me the same old excuse that rolls off everyone’s tongues nowadays – “I’m busy” – oh whatever!! So am I, but surely we can make time for those important to us…? I guess I’m not that important to most…feeling very sad and sorry for myself 😦


4 thoughts on “Bitching rant

  1. Made me a little sad to read that you are so unhappy 😦 I think a lot of people are unhappy but it’s really rare to find someone who admits it. Keep your head up and just know that everything is ok in the end, if it’s not ok then it’s not the end! xx

    • Thanks love, I really appreciate the encouragement…feeling a little better today, although still a tiny bit fragile. I think I just needed to rant and get the feelings out constructively! sorry to make you sad, I know a lot of people are suffering too, maybe my transparancy will let others know that its ok to let it out every now and again, I think its good for our mental health and well being to be honest and real 🙂

      • I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better. It puts a lot of shit into perspective when other people are sad, sometimes I get so caught up in my own shit that I forget there are other people who are down and upset in the world you know??? xxx

        You’re totally right. Harbouring hurt and pain is unhealthy, a good rant is good for the soul!! xx

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